Walking with Mary in the New Year
As we celebrate Christmas and the end of our secular year, we are naturally drawn to reflect on the balances in our lives and what “New Year Resolutions” we can commit to. The most common one we work on is our work/life balance. How can we take care of the family and friends in our lives while also doing a good job at work? How do we balance play and work? Leisure and work? Self-care and sacrifice? As I’ve grown in my faith and continue to learn about the saints, I realize that they didn’t focus on balancing these things. They focused on God’s will, His love for them, and how they can love Him in return at all times.
Reflecting on Christmases of the past, my happiest memories circle around the presents I received, the good food I ate, the fun time with family, and the pretty Christmas dress I got to wear to Mass. Now, I still look forward to the presents, the food, the time with family, and (now) the Christmas music at Mass! However, I find that I am preoccupied with secular traditions and I often fail to keep Christ at the center of Christmas. Now that I am married with a child and another one on the way, I feel more and more pressure to put Christ in Christmas because of its impact on my family. If I continue to focus on the way our secular world has taught us to celebrate Christmas, it will trickle into my children’s lives and make lasting impressions. Since becoming a mother, I've learned so much more about the ways that my actions and inactions affect those around me; especially the worrisome question of my inactions. What things am I not doing that could be critical in developing saints in my family?
Mary is (literally) the perfect saint to reflect on close to Christmas. Especially for mothers and those with families. She gave absolutely everything she had to God and her family without getting caught up in any selfishness. Immediately, when the angel approached her and told her that she would bear the Son of God, she didn't think of herself and how it would impact her entire life. She didn't get the full plan, she didn't get a play-by-play, she didn't even get assurance that she would have protection from a husband. She accepted God’s will over her own no matter the cost. The angel left her there needing to rely on her trust in God and hope. Furthermore, after receiving this miraculous news, she continued to think of others over herself. She visited her cousin instead of doing whatever she would have wanted to do to prepare for Jesus’ coming. In this, I ask myself: do I trust God completely? Do I have hope in His plans? Do I put the needs of others above my own?
Mary didn't balance her life in the way we would do in our modern times. She didn't balance her work and leisure, she didn't balance her prayer time and play time. She didn’t rely on her self-care days. She gave everything she had. She worked constantly, gave constantly, prayed constantly. She never fell into the sin of omission. She gave and gave more.
As a mother, it's so easy for me to fall into my selfish thoughts and feelings: feeling sorry for myself and my lack of sleep, my lack of free time, my lack of quiet time… but I am blessed by the work that God has given me. Work is a joy to have. He has given me this role so that I don't stand idle in the streets but rather I am put to work in His vineyard. I often ask for more strength and wish I had Mary’s virtue. I am comforted by the fact that God gives me everything I need to become a saint and lead my family into heaven. Mary had a very important role: she would be the Mother of God. She needed to be free of original sin to accomplish her given role. Our roles are different, but through the graces of the sacraments such as baptism, confirmation, reconciliation, and the eucharist, God gives us everything we need to accomplish the role he has given us.
How can I use Mary as my model this Christmas season? With all the changes that I want to make in my life to deepen my love of God, I know it’s wisest to take small steps rather than giant leaps. As humans, we accomplish more that way. This year, I want to be better than I was last year (I will have the same goal next year). So for this Christmas season, I want to focus more on Christ. Throughout the Christmas season I want to sing religious Christmas songs with my toddler and read the story of Christmas to him every night. I want to make time for personal prayer and family prayer. I want my toddler to see my husband and me focused on Christ, prayer, and giving of ourselves. While our toddler may not be able to participate in volunteer work, the rosary, or discussion of God, he can learn so much by watching how much we care.
I pray that we can all draw closer to God this Christmas and know that there is always more to give. Whether it’s more time in prayer and reflection, more quality time with family, more volunteer work, or more education in God- we aren’t everything we should be yet. We shouldn’t settle and we shouldn’t feel comfortable until Christ truly is present in our hearts and minds unceasingly just like His saints.
Rachel Weigel